Weight

"That girl should not be wearing that dress"

"I can't believe that girl is going to nationals and she is THAT out of shape"

I hear things like that all of the time. When you do pageants you figure out that there are pageant forums. My personal favorite and most hated is actually the same one. They talk a lot about great issues and gorgeous girls and it is very well updated. However, I hate this board because I hear a lot of criticism. and it is not necessary constructive. Some of it is just down right rude.

Us pageant girls and parents do read what is on these sites. It is hurtful and it does not help many of us. Some of yes, but some of it is just down right rude and hurtful. For example...

(This came directly from the voy blogs)

Subject: Miss USA "No-No's"

Author:Errington

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Date Posted: 13:24:32 03/09/10 Tue

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There are only two women I do not want to win Miss USA. They are Oklahoma and California. I don't care who else wins. Any of the other 49 would be fine, NOT Oklahoma or California. If one of these two wins I will never watch Miss USA again because I will be dead of heart failure.

I dont understand why people say things like this? These girls are beautiful. I have talked to Oklahoma (whish is the blonde) She is VERY sweet and would make a great Miss USA.

I remember when I won Miss Iowa Teen USA and when I first found out about these boards. I actualy googled myself because mom and I were scrapbooking about diving. I wanted to get on and find the state results for Diving that year. When I googled myself all of these "Discussion" links pulled up, and obviously being a normal human being, I wanted to know what they were about.

As I began reading some comments were nice, about how much they liked me and others were just mean. They would say things like I was to short, I was frumpy, I was too big. etc.. for the record I was 120lbs and 5'6 I wore a size 0 jean. I was no way too short, frumpy or big. But I began to believe it. The longer I was in reign the more I heard these comments.  It all started with this photo:

I recieved a lot of support from fans who would argue aganist when people said things like this. And even though I think of myself as a strong individual, it really got to me. I had a personal trainer for Miss Teen USA and even what he said I began to take critically. He would say he wanted to work more on my thighs, I would take it as they were fat. Even though that wasn't what he meant. I would run everyday and I started watching what I ate. Whatever I ate I would work out in calories. When I finally found the dress I wanted to wear at Miss Teen USA I was so happy. I loved it, I thought it looked great and I felt great in it. When I went to get it altered becuase it was too long, they told me I needed to lose 10 to 15 more pounds. I thought these people were crazy! But they had been involved in the pageant industry longer than I had so I believed them. I couldn't lose the weight. Not matter what. After Miss Teen USA I didn't want to do anymore pageants. I was still having a hard time eating.

I then met my current boyfriend Scott, who walked me through this. With his help I began eating what I wanted, when I wanted and not working out afterwards. He made me feel beautiful for who I was. I was beautiful, maybe I wasn't 5'10 and weigh 100lbs. But I was healthy and I started loving myself for me again.

This happens to a lot of girls. When so many people tell you something, you start to believe it. Regardless if it is true or not. The one thing I always hold on to is  that it took only one person to make me understand. My freshman year of college I gained 30lbs. I started dating my boyfriend Scott. He thought I was the "Hottest" girl he had ever met. I thought he was crazy. As I started to lose the weight, he didn't understand why. He thought I was beautiful the way I was. In his eyes I was not bigger. It wasn't until I showed him before and after pictures right next to each other did he understand. He still didn't think I needed to but he heard my point of view. I was loved and someone thought I was beautiful for me. And I think that is what ALL pageant girls need to remember when training for a pageant.